Home
menotoria's reflecting pool [entries|friends|calendar]
°°°mEnOtoRia°°°

Map
[ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ]
[ calendar | livejournal calendar ]

Too darn hot [Saturday

July 4th, 2009 @ 4:47pm]
I'm sometimes referred to as someone who can go on about a topic for a long time without interruption. Whether that is considered a positive or negative thing is up to every individual to decide. In fact, it wasn't until I started university that I learnt to elaborate on little details.
At this point in my studies I'm taking great advantage of this. I'm currently working on an empirical study on genitive constructions with regard to New Zealand and British English. I've been working on spreadsheets, prior research and Chi-square calculations for weeks to achieve the most genuine and representative result possible.
I've now started work on wording the coded data which is going to measure about 15 pages.
I'm supposed to hand it in by August 15 but I will have to finish it at least two weeks earlier as I'm leaving for the States at the end of July.
I don't have much time to breathe at the moment but it might be that the current pressure makes the prospect of the upcoming holidays even more exciting. 
 
Next Friday I'm going to write my Portuguese exam. I'm proud to say that I have 100% attendance and I'm well-prepared. I've studied hard and without a real break over the past few months. 
Yesterday, I wrote my final essay for the written expression course which is conducted by a journalist from Birmingham. I was quite satisifed with the result (I wrote a detailed report on the current situation in Iran with regard to media censorship) until I learnt that it had become much too long and I was obliged to cut a few paragraphs which kind of mutilated the whole thing. 
 
In a few weeks it will finally be over and I can go back to the States. I will start the Blondie tour in either Albuquerque or Memphis.
 
Yesterday, I bought a front row center ticket for the Blondie show in Winterhaven. It came up on the venue site right away which really made my day. I now have most of my tickets for the tour. There are a few gaps in between the concerts and I will have to see if it's still possible to obtain good tickets for those shows. I will keep trying to make it possible. I'm looking forward to each of the shows and there are some particular places I'm especially excited about. I'm positive that it's going to be a very adventurous tour across the United States full of beautiful moments and amazing places. And what's of course most important of all: I will see Debbie almost every night. That will be heavenly. I can't think of anything more beautiful in the world than that. 
 
The next day after the Brooklyn show on August 14 there will be a Tori Amos concert which I think is quite a coincidence. I bought myself a ticket in case I want to go. The show in Cincinnati on the 15 will be seated so it don't need to line up early which means I can travel to Ohio on the same day. 
 
I really enjoyed watching the little tour interview with Debbie, yesterday. She is absolutely cute in it. It made me smile much. 
I hope that she had a very wonderful birthday.
1 + comment + memory + edit

Friday night [Friday

June 5th, 2009 @ 11:09pm]
One night recently, I took a walk down memory lane. I sat down and read all my private tour reports from last summer again. All of them are meticulously detailed which made it a very long and beautiful walk. I enjoyed going to all those various places one more time in my imagination. It immediately brought back this warm feeling I had during the entire tour. Written words do have that power to take you back to certain moments and revive the most beautiful memories in a very vivid way. 

I had a week of vacation which I spent carefully organizing my trip to the States. I will start the tour in either Albuquerque or Memphis with a few gaps in between as I unfortunately didn't get good tickets for all the shows.
It's going to be a very exciting and long summer. I look forward to seeing Debbie again every single minute of the day.
Not only do I plan to write reports about every individual day but I also want to take a few pictures of the places that I'm going to visit.

I've been learning Portuguese for a few weeks now. It seems it's not nearly as fashionable as Chinese or Japanese these days but it sounds really beautiful which is why I wanted to look deeper into the language. So far I've found the grammar and vocabulary to be rather easy to learn. The pronunciation, however, is a bit more difficult at times since the spelling doesn't necessarily relate to the way certain words are pronounced. All in all it seems to have more diphthongs which is what makes it sound so melodic.
I have the impression that the Brazilian pronunciation is more similar to the way it's spelled than the Iberian Portuguese where many sounds tend to be swallowed and the 'sh' sound (which I'm very fond of) occurs more frequently.
The tutor is from Lisbon so I'm naturally picking up the Portuguese way of speaking it.
I had to realize for myself that it's probably the most modern and progressive language I've ever come across. As soon as something appears to be redundant it's no longer spelled or pronounced.
For example, the Spanish write and say "en este país" (in this country) while the Portuguese contract 'em' + 'este' and say "neste país" (among many other examples). Since the "c" is not pronounced in words such as "director" it will be officially dropped in a few years.
All these things simplify the language for a native or fluent speaker. For a learner it means one has to remember more rules. 
comment + memory + edit

Viajé de Hamburgo hasta Beirut [Monday

May 4th, 2009 @ 9:11pm]
The last few months have not exactly been very exciting which is why I didn't update this journal as frequently as I usually do. In fact they've been very busy and a bit stressful, too, as I was working on several university projects and a presentation which took up most of my time.
Last weekend I finished my last project for a course about genitive and of-constructions. It's actually quite interesting, but the way it's handled by the tutor is rather ineffective in my opinion. It's more focused on dealing with technical stuff such as evaluating hypotheses in Excel spreadsheets than the field of investigation itself.
On the other hand, I'm doing a generative syntax course which has a rather old-fashioned way of dealing with the topic including reading textbooks in little portions which I prefer a lot.
So much for the past few months.

From July on, when the semester is over, I will be able to fill this place with more beautiful memories of journeys that may take me to some places I've never been before.
I already have a few tickets to see Debbie in the States this summer. Unfortunately not as many as I wished because for some reason it's really difficult to get good tickets for this tour - but I will keep trying, of course. Anything for Debbie.
This is going to be a long summer and the path towards it will be plastered with plenty of work. But no matter how packed each day will be, my thoughts are constantly with those beautiful memories of past special moments, shows and tours and the prospect of more wonderful days to come. 

Ironically, I never see that many concerts in Hamburg even though most of the venues are only a stone's throw away from my apartment. There was a time in my life when I would take my camera off the shelf and wouldn't miss a single good show here. I don't miss those days. I felt a bit restless and insatiable then. Now I feel like I've found my "home" which is not at a venue a few subway stations away but somewhere possibly in a very remote place on this planet where I can see Debbie. Seeing her gives me the warmest feeling in the world, just like every single thought about this truly wonderful person does (the latest pictures from the New Jersey Hall of Fame induction really made my day today).

I still go out sometimes to see other artists if I happen to listen to their music a lot. It's nice to hear the music live, to see what kind of people like it and to exchange some impressions with fellow attendees. 
I really like the type of underground freak-folkish stuff that's coming from the States these days. I personally think that the world hasn't had such a vast amount of great artists for decades. I really want to see Joanna Newsom someday (I still highly recommend  "Ys" which has become one of my all-time favorite albums).
Another band that I wanted to see live was Beirut. I heard that they were coming to Hamburg and decided to go to the show last night. Originally, I was thrilled to hear that Zach and his band were playing at the Fabrik, which is one of my favorite venues in the world, but unfortunately it was moved to the Docks, a bigger place in the red light district. It was sold out very soon which kind of foreshadowed what I had to expect. 
Surprisingly there were hardly any locals. There were plenty of people from France, Poland and Austria. I met a girl who had come all the way from Slovakia for the show. The venue was packed. The majority of the audience was really young. The band played two encores and when the lights had gone on people still wanted a third one. Unfortunately, they didn't play any of my favorite songs such as "Rhineland" or "Prenzlauer Berg and I didn't know all the songs but that was okay. They played one Turkish song in the encore called "Siki Siki Baba" which I particularly liked.
Zach's voice sounds even better live than on the records.
It was definitely an interesting experience and I think the band has a promising future. 
I took a picture of the setlist.

A few weeks ago I gave my personal website playmebackwards.com a new layout. I had started it in 2003 as my own creative ground. The last proper update was posted in 2005 if I'm not mistaken. I put some of my favorite self-taken pictures on it. I'm aware that most of them are not a representative reflection of the real world outside (it's not supposed to be) - only a little extract of how I wish it was. 
comment + memory + edit

muito bolo [Sunday

April 12th, 2009 @ 4:16pm]
I'm trying something really interesting now. I've wanted to do it for a few years but now I feel courageous enough to jump in at the deep end. Over the years I tried to improve my Spanish until I was somewhat proficient enough to have the confidence to start learning another language. I now signed up for Portuguese at the university (in addition to English and Spanish) and was accepted. It's going to be a lot of work but it will be worth it. It's such a beautiful and melodic language. I've always liked the sound of it.
 
Last week I started a course on the woman's film from the 1930s. I was a bit worried that I would find myself in some kind of feminist cabaret but fortunately that did not happen. It's part of my literature studies. I voluntarily signed up for the first presentation on the movie "Jezebel" which I'm going to do next week. I'm nearly done with my preparations.
I watched the movie on Friday. It's a great film and fun to watch as it is uncommonly unpredictable but still transparent. I really like Bette Davis in the movie. Her acting draws attention to itself. That is rare and really hard to find these days.
 
I'm undecided whether to do the advanced written expression course in Spanish already but I did sign up for the grammar course. At first I was a bit afraid but it turned out to be fun. The Spanish are always so full of energy and their methods are totally unconventional. It's very refreshing when the tutor all of a sudden starts to burst into a song by Paulina Rubio.
 
There are times when I feel the urge to leave the anglophone or Spanish music sphere for a second and I start to look into sounds from other countries (in a completely unpolitical way). It may be phonetic nonsense to me, as I don't necessarily understand the words sometimes, but that can be very invigorating in a way.
I've been listening to a lot of Lebanese music lately. I can't really say why. It seems that when you start looking into Arabic music the majority of artists that come up seem to be from Lebanon. Maybe it's a coincidence.
I've always liked to listen to Fairuz (or Fairouz) who is very popular in the Arabic-speaking world. I also came across a singer named Googoosh from Iran whose music is worth getting into. It's a bit difficult to find contemporary artists of high musical standard. Nonetheless, they're certainly very interesting to listen to, as well, simply because of the language and the foreign sound of the instruments. I think it's important sometimes to look beyond one's own nose and check out what other countries have in store in a cultural sense, especially if the national media does not explicitly focus on them. I think the cultural globalization is still a bit sluggish in some respects. This world has so much more to offer than what MTV wants to show the kids of today.

This is sort of an overview of what I've been doing the last two weeks. I'm going to spare the depressing details as I've been feeling anything but good lately.

What else am I meant to do... I have no answer. I wish I did.
comment + memory + edit

end of March [Tuesday

March 31st, 2009 @ 10:35am]
My mailbox has been feeling rather lonely and empty lately, but yesterday I found this little precious item in it that I had been looking forward to for months. The release date had been postponed a few times but now I finally received my copy of the "Elegy" DVD. Tonight I'm going to watch it again. It's quite forseeable that it's going to be very emotional and I will shed a few tears watching the deeply moving scene with Debbie. I vividly remember the way it made me feel when I watched it at the theater in October right before I went to New York. I've never seen anything more moving on the screen before. It moved me to a degree that equaled pure pain and left me paralyzed for quite a while. 
I can't really say why I watched it only once. Maybe I wanted to preserve the memory of that special feeling it gave me. However, now I'm longing to watch it again and I'm really excited.

I've been following all of the reviews from the Chile show at the weekend. It was equally beautiful and painful to read about details of the show that I was unable to attend myself.
Beautiful because all of them were unexceptionally positive and flattering. I'm sure that Debbie made the Chileans very happy with her performance. I hope it was worth the long journey and that she had a great time during the show and her trip. The pictures I saw and the video I watched were absolutely beautiful and made me get lost in memories of the last shows I saw.
It was hearbreaking for me not to be able to attend the concert in Santiago but this summer I will go on another trip to America. I already have a ticket for the Reno show and I will try to make this year's birthday a special one and hopefully get a good ticket for the Boston show.
I have a feeling this is going to be a long summer with lots of beautiful memories and new impressions.

I wonder if there will be another little one-off show for the general public somewhere before the tour starts. It would be so wonderful to bridge the time. I miss her so much.
comment + memory + edit

last day [Wednesday

March 11th, 2009 @ 3:04pm]
The day before yesterday was my last day in New York (for now). I had decided to stop there for a while because I've always found it extremely difficult to move on and readjust after a tour. It's impossible for me to start focusing on everyday things as I still spend a lot of time reminiscing and wishing those special days had never ended. It can take a very, very long time. I always try to keep the memories vivid as long as possible. I figured that New York would be the best place for a stopover and to indulge in reminiscences of moments when I saw and met Debbie, days which are the most special and most beautiful days in my life.
I miss her very much.
I wrote a lot, I read a lot and I dreamt a lot. I listened to some music, as well.
On the last evening I went to see Heather Nova, a singer-songwriter from Bermuda whose melancholic songs often reflect my own mood and frame of mind.
I've always liked her music. It has accompanied me since her release of "Siren" in 1998, which is still one of my favorite albums.
It was her first show in the States in eight years ("I timed it pretty well. I skipped the whole Bush era"). 
I didn't see her last show in Hamburg in October and so I wanted to take the opportunity and see her play in New York while I was there.
I finished my White Chocolate Mocca and entered the bar when everybody else was already inside. I still got a good spot where I could see the stage. Heather started the show right away. 
She played a lot of my favorite songs like "Heart And Shoulder", "London Rain", "Winter Blue", "Island" and "Out In New Mexico." She dedicated "I Miss My Sky" to Amelia Earheart which tells a story from her point of view about how she never crashed into the ocean but survived on a deserted island.

During my stay in New York I updated the Portland ( http://ontheboundary.livejournal.com/142124.html ) and San Francisco ( http://ontheboundary.livejournal.com/139861.html ) show reports and made them a bit more detailed.
comment + memory + edit

Thursday night in NYC [Friday

March 6th, 2009 @ 5:14am]
I've always believed that when somebody has a good idea one should put it into practice right away. All the years have shown me that spontaneous ideas are often the real gems among all ideas. I woke up with such an idea on a Sunday morning a few weeks ago and as the day progressed I was convinced it might offer the way I had been looking for for a long time. I thought it would cut a swath and open a new path not only for myself. It took me a lot of courage but since it means so very much to me I dared to take a chance. I hope it was received the way it was arisen from my heart, with beautiful and sincere intentions. 

I went to see Marissa Nadler at Joe's Pub last night. It was really weird to go back to the place after that most wonderful experience in October when I saw the show with Roy Nathanson. A part of me was scared it would become too painful, another part of me was dying to revive the precious memory again. It was indeed all coming back. I still felt Debbie's presence and I was kind of spellbound. More than anything did I wish I would see her play there again at that beautiful and intimate bar with the cozy atmosphere of a living room. No, I didn't really want to see anyone else but her at that place. I was one of the last people to enter the bar. I have no motivation to be in the front row for anyone else.

Marissa Nadler is considered part of the New Weird America wave, a movement of contemporary folk singer-songwriters who mostly play guitar but also in popular music unconventional instruments such as the harp or banjo. The most striking feature of these artists are probably their unorthodox lyrics. Their music is mostly unpolitical and contains a lot of references to nature which might give one the impression they spend a vast majority of their freetime reading Thoreau or woodcarving. 
I find this type of music very refreshing in contrast to what the media likes to sell as mainstream, especially in times like these. It's like a statement that the future should not be found in advancement of any kind, making everything more convenient, smaller, faster, impersonal, but in going back to nature, the origin of mankind and the rediscovery of transcendentalism to give the overstimulated brain of today a break and to allow it to wind down - if only for 16 minutes while listening to Joanna Newsom's "Only Skin."

I'm going back to Joe's Pub once more next week before I go back to Germany.
comment + memory + edit

San Francisco [Friday

March 6th, 2009 @ 4:01am]
updated on March 5:

San Francisco - February 25, 2009

After hardly four hours of sleep my cell phone alarm clock rang at about four in the morning. I was still really tired and stayed in bed for another half an hour and kept reminiscing about the wonderful moments the night before after the show until I decided to have a quick shower. I had packed most of my stuff a day earlier as I knew I would have to struggle with my suitcase which was slightly overpacked. Some brute force eventually did the trick. Because of my great talent to get lost in casinos I left the room quite early and dragged my suitcase through the halls where some people had the nerve to gamble at such an early hour. Since I had no room in my suitcase I had to wear my winter clothes. "You look like you're going somewhere cold", a guy on my left remarked. "No, I'm coming from somewhere cold", I replied. I dropped my key at the reception and took a taxi to the airport. The taxi driver was very impressed to hear that I had seen Blondie the night before in Primm. He told me he had seen them before, too and how great they were. I asked him if he lived in Las Vegas and he responded he lived a few miles outside the center in a nice and casino-free area.
I saw a sign that directed travelers to Death Valley which made me wonder how far that might've been. 
I was glad to be leaving Las Vegas as I didn't feel comfortable in the city. The huge buildings were kind of suffocating.
I checked in for my flight to San Francisco and went through the security check. It didn't take long and I soon had to realize that I was way too early as I still had two hours. I bought something to drink and sat down near the gate where I went online. I read a few articles about the plane crash in Amsterdam.
The flight was on time and it was quite short. I was the only non-Japanese person on the flight as everyone else was connecting. Announcements were made in English and Japanese.
There were no clouds in the sky and the view was really beautiful. I tried to have a nap on the plane but it didn't work very well. The airport in San Francisco was right at the water's edge next to a really long dam which I later had to cross.
I found my luggage quickly and took a taxi to the hotel. The weather there was a lot different. It was kind of cold and cloudy but for some reason I was glad to be back in a cold climate. The taxi was stuck in traffic on a bridge for a little while. I noticed how green everything looked. The tiny houses on the hill were a real contrast to the huge casino buildings in Las Vegas.
The Russian taxi driver was very chatty and told me all kinds of stories about himself and the city. As I had told him that it was my first time in San Francisco he pointed out a few buildings like the city hall to me.
The ride was fairly long and I was glad when I finally arrived at the hotel. 
I didn't recognize it right away as it had a basement entrance and it looked so colorful that I was instantly reminded of a kindergarten.
The hotel was run by Japanese people in Japantown and it looked kind of interesting. I checked in and took the lift upstairs. 
My room was very colorful, as well, and had a huge painting on the wall. 
I didn't have time for a nap and got ready for the show right away. I really liked the wooden buildings I passed on the way to the venue. The architecture was quite interesting. The sun was shining now. The streets were busy and I felt quite relaxed. It's funny how the atmosphere can change from one moment to another while being in a foreign place.
I went down the road and turned left where I saw the green Fillmore street sign. The crew bus was parked in front of the venue. I met Rene again and after a while the two guys from the Portland show arrived, as well.
The later it got, the colder it became and I was glad that I had decided not to wear a skirt. I went to Starbucks around the corner to get a White Chocolate Mocca.
Allen arrived a little later. He sat down next to me and gave me two prints of that truly gorgeous picture with Debbie. My eyes instinctively got all teary. I was quite speechless. I've had a really hard time since the end of the tour and I take this picture everywhere I go now. Only a short glimpse makes me smile again. Words really cannot explain how happy it makes me and I'm eternally grateful that Allen took it.
The concert was sold out and everyone in the crowd loved and enjoyed the show. Debbie looked breathtaking and her voice sounded really, really beautiful (as it always does). This time I particularly enjoyed the extended part in "Heart Of Glass." A silent voice within me wanted to whisper to her to keep on singing. Every added note was a special treasure and the idea of her leaving the stage would've broken my heart.
I wondered what kind of tea she was drinking during the show. I could smell a slight whiff of cinnamon which was very pleasant. 
Then the inevitable moment came and after "Please Please Me" she had to say goodbye. It was really sad and quite unbearable. 
It was a very special tour. My dearest songs were "Two Times Blue", "Whiteout" and "Liar, Liar" and the fact that they were added into the setlist made me very happy. They were like an island I wanted to settle down on. 
I loved each and every one of the songs. "The Hardest Part" really sounded amazing, too. Debbie makes it a very special song live and the way she sings it gives it a whole new significance. Then, I was also delighted to hear "(I'm Always Touched By Your) Presence, Dear", another live favorite of mine.
After the show we were waiting by the bus. Chris came out first. He was really nice. I really appreciated his kindness on the whole tour. 
It broke my heart that I couldn't say goodbye to Debbie after the show as I was being pushed away the moment that she came out. 
I hope she enjoyed the remaining shows in sunny California and that she had a safe trip back to snowy New York.
 
Unfortunately the tour is over now. 
I didn't go straight back to Germany. I'm in New York right now and I will stay here for a bit.
I went shopping on Bleecker Street on Sunday where I found a few old records.
comment + memory + edit

Las Vegas/Primm Valley [Friday

February 27th, 2009 @ 3:02pm]
going to Las Vegas - February 23, 2009

I took the plane from Portland at around noon and arrived in the middle of the desert about two hours later. The take-off had been very bumpy due to bad weather conditions and I felt sick. The view from the plane while landing was quite amazing, though.
My experience of arriving in Las Vegas equaled a cultural shock. I entered the terminal building where my first thought was: "I'm in hell." And for me it was - slot machines, noise, mass tourism.
I had to realize that my thick winter coat, the scarf and the hat were not necessarily needed.
The taxi line outside the terminal building seemed endless but the ride to the hotel was rather short. I didn't feel comfortable in the city and didn't like the buildings I saw in the center. It took me about fifteen minutes to get from the reception to my room which was unproportionally big and had a view on the pyramid of the Luxor casino which was an insult to the eye compared to the beautiful view on the desert I could've had. I found the place to be depressing and therefore went to bed early. I woke up again at 4 in the morning.

Primm - February 24, 2009

The show took place at a casino a few miles outside Las Vegas. I would've had some problems getting there by myself as it was too far for a taxi but fortunately Rene and Allen were so kind to pick me up at the hotel and so we drove down the long road to Primm Valley together.
I loved this show so very much and it was probably my favorite on the tour.
Since I had a second row seat near the exit I was hoping for a stage rush. Someone said that the first two rows were allowed to get up and walk to the stage. I could see what they meant as those rows were arranged in a way that the middle aisle was blocked and no one could walk through. I didn't know people were allowed to get up before the show and so I missed that some people were standing right at the stage already. Jim walked up to me and wondered if I would let someone else take "my spot." So I quickly got up and found a spot on the center left which was also really good. A security guy walked up to me and asked for my ticket to prove I was indeed in the second row. Fortunately someone was holding the space for me as I walked back to my seat.
Debbie looked absolutely gorgeous in her beautiful dress. It looked like it was made especially for her.
I couldn't take my eyes off of her heavenly smile. It seemed like she was shining (in my book she always is because she's a true sunshine - the sunshine that brightens up my days). I enjoyed every second of the show. Debbie interacted a lot with us which is always very wonderful. It's like an exchange with the audience. She told a beautiful anecdote about how she got up early in the morning and had a breathtaking (she used two different words here) view from her window on the desert and how she learnt to appreciate the beauty of that area. I'm sure it must've been really pretty. That was very sweet.
After the show I was given the chance to meet Debbie. I was in my own personal heaven again. There were a lot of people this time but I had my beautiful moment with her. These moments are the most beautiful and precious moments of my life.
While I was talking to her Allen wanted to take a picture of us. It was totally unexpected. He wanted to email me a copy of it after the tour. The day before yesterday, while waiting for the San Francisco show Allen showed up and presented two prints of the picture. My eyes got all teary and I couldn't help but cry. It's such a pretty picture. Debbie looks radiantly beautiful in it. I'd love to give her a copy of it.
I went to bed with my arms wrapped around sweet memories of a truly beautiful night.
1 + comment + memory + edit

last show [Wednesday

February 25th, 2009 @ 8:37pm]
I'm in San Francisco right now. Tonight will be the last show of the tour for me. I'm dying to go to Oroville but unfortunately there were no tickets available for the show.
I've enjoyed this tour so very much and the idea of this being the last show is too heartbreaking for me. I already miss seeing Debbie.
I had such a wonderful time last night. All shows on this tour have been fantastic and I think Primm was my favorite show on this tour so far (though nothing will beat that precious and wonderful moment in Vancouver after the show, of course). I'm going to write more detailed reports real soon.
comment + memory + edit

Portland [Wednesday

February 25th, 2009 @ 12:00am]
updated on March 8:

going to Portland - February 21, 2009

My flight to Portland was at around noon which gave me some time to sleep in. I was happy that I had been able to give my letter to Debbie the night before and hoped she would like it. It was a sunny morning and I listened to music on my iPod before I packed my stuff and took a taxi to the airport. The snow-covered mountains looked really beautiful and the whole area seemed very peaceful.
The taxi stopped in front of the terminal building. I saw a table with custom forms and I figured I had to fill out one of them. The building confused me. I went to a screen of U.S. Airlines where I wanted to check in but it directed me to Air Canada. I tried it again and this time it worked. I didn't know where to drop my luggage as I didn't see a belt. I hesitated for a second and went to the Air Canada desk. The woman explained that there were no belts at the airport. I gave her my passport and she gave me a green Visa Waiver form which I filled out. She labeled my suitcase and told me to go through the aisle of duty free shops where I could leave my luggage. I passed the security check and sat down near the departure gate where I went online. The plane was really tiny and one had a nice and cloud-free view on the water during the flight.
The weather in Portland was not as nice as in Vancouver.
I could see from a distance that it was an industrial city. There were green lakes which looked kind of interesting. 
After the plane had landed I got off and walked across the airfield. I picked up my suitcase and went outside to the taxi stand. It was quite a long drive. The taxi crossed a bridge and entered the city. It stopped in front of the hotel. After I had checked in I took the elevator upstairs and had to think that the hotel looked very European. The bathroom reminded me of a GDR prefabricated high-rise building. 
I had to remind myself a few times that I was in fact in the States.
I decided to have dinner instead of lunch. I had a bath and slept for a while as I was very tired. I woke up again at around 10 in the evening. 
I ordered a sandwich and a salad. It was more than I expected and the person who brought the food wondered if I was really that hungry or if there was someone else in the room. Of course, I didn't finish most of it and I wished I hadn't ordered that much.

Portland - February 22, 2009

It was Sunday morning and I woke up pretty late. The ground was slightly shaking. It was hardly noticeable but it lasted for about an hour and I wondered what caused that. I was hungry and decided to order breakfast in the room. The sun wasn't shining and I figured it would be cold outside. 
I left the hotel at around one o'clock and went to the Roseland Theater which was only two blocks away. The streets were almost empty. At the venue I met two nice guys and we chatted for a little while until we decided to leave again and come back later. I returned to the hotel where I stayed for another couple of hours.
A few minutes after three I packed my stuff again and walked to the venue. At the back of the building I met a small of group of people that was waiting for the band. We talked for a while until the tour bus arrived. It made me so happy to see Debbie again. She looked absolutely stunning and cute beyond expression. I couldn't take my eyes off of her. Nothing and no one in this world could ever look more beautiful. If I had a picture it would be my favorite and I would take it everywhere. She took a lot of time to sign records and made everyone very happy. One of the guys was so ecstatic that he called all his friends. It was very moving.
I met Rick in front of the main door. It was nice to see him again. He's always so kind and friendly.
The group of people got bigger and I was the only girl. It was such a contrast to the audience in Helsinki which consisted of mainly teenage girls. 
I had to show my passport at the door and the friendly security person looked at me and said "welcome to Portland." I think I was too nervous to respond.
Inside there was no barrier and I got my beloved spot in the center. Dahlia, the local support act, started the show. The singer slightly resembled Björk and sounded a bit like Goldfrapp. 
After their performance I swapped places with the guy next to me as my view was blocked by a fan.
Debbie looked so gorgeous and sounded wonderful. I enjoyed every second of the show very much. She thanked her friends and pointed out how glad she was to be in a place of which she could pronounce the name unlike "Spokane, Spo-kann." She was really cute, just wonderful.
After the show we were all standing outside and waved to the car as it was leaving the venue. 
I got all sentimental and sad. It's always heartbreaking for me to see her go.
comment + memory + edit

back on the road [Tuesday

February 24th, 2009 @ 2:24pm]
Of all the places I've seen on this tour so far I liked Vancouver (or British Columbia in general) best. I've always been a nature person and I really found the mountains with the snow on top and the landscape near the water to be very beautiful. It revives your spirits and sharpens your instincts.
In the city center everything looked so clean and new. The waterside reminded me a bit of Hamburg and the harbor, except that it looked a tiny bit lighter and friendlier.
The old part of town, Gastown with the steam clock, was really pretty, too.
I visited a market where they sold all types of different food. Some areas smelled really good.

Richmond - February 20, 2009

The show in Richmond at the River Rock Casino was the first concert of the West Coast tour. I was really excited and curious about possible setlist changes and most of all I was looking forward to finally see Debbie again after all those months.
I had gotten a front row seat on Ticketmaster pretty much right away which was really surprising because very often they don't offer them until a show is only a few days away. I thought I was sitting on the right side but in fact I was pretty much in the center. It wouldn't really have made a difference as there was a stage rush when the show began, though.
Before the show I was talking to a nice couple from Vancouver. We talked about Canadian music and how underrated some of it really is. I told them that it's mostly U.S. American music that is promoted and sold in Europe and that hardly anyone has heard of many artists that are famous in Canada even though they make really good music. The monopoly position of the U.S. music industry in the world and their great impact on music television and radio made me give up on MTV etc. almost completely. I don't want to listen to the music that the music industry wants me to listen to. I like to go searching for it myself. If I had relied on the industry I would never have come across many great artists and bands. That's the reason I like last.fm. It's not the music industry that controls one's personal taste, it's the listener who reveals what's being played.

Then the show began. It was overwhelmingly wonderful and moving for me to see Debbie again.
She looked absolutely breathtaking and her voice was amazing, crystal-clear and beautiful. I love it so very much. Like every time, it was a lot of fun to watch her do her thing.
It made me very happy to hear "Two Times Blue", but also "Whiteout" and "Liar, Liar" which was a real surprise. The order of the songs was totally unpredictable and it was fun to guess the songs as they started. I didn't guess "Liar, Liar" until she started singing the words and when I realized what it was I was completely shocked - in the most positive way, of course. It's great to hear these songs, that seem long-forgotten, being revived. Debbie has an enormous back catalogue of songs and to hear one of the - to the general public - lesser known songs is an amazing gift for the people who know all the songs. It's very fascinating to hear how a song can be reinterpreted after all the years.
Another surprise was "The Hardest Part" which sounded really great live. The crowd just loved it.

I experienced one of the (if not the) most beautiful and precious moments in my life after the show. First it looked like no one was coming out but it turned out we were all waiting by the wrong exit. The bus turned around the corner and after a while Debbie came out of the building. She looked so truly overwhelmingly beautiful. I've never seen anyone more beautiful in my life. I wish I had told her that. I was very happy to be able to give her my present. I hope from the bottom of my heart that she likes it.
The moment meant the whole world to me. I was in heaven and went to bed with a smile on my face.
I hope that she has a lot of fun on this tour, that she enjoys to see all the different places and that all the travelling is not too tiring.
comment + memory + edit

O Canada [Friday

February 20th, 2009 @ 1:46pm]

Vancouver 2009, originally uploaded by me.

Vancouver 2009, originally uploaded by me.

I arrived in Vancouver the day before yesterday. I took a flight from Hamburg at around noon and had to change at London Heathrow. The plane to Canada was supposed to take off at 5. Everything went flawlessy. The plane headed to the runway and accelerated - before it came to a complete stop and the take-off was aborted. The plane returned to the gate. For a while nobody knew what was going on until the captain announced that the generator was broken. Cars came and engineers were running around. All in all it took about one hour until another announcement was made which said that we had to leave the aircraft to change planes. Back in the terminal building everyone had to wait for another two and a half hours until the plane was ready to be boarded. I had a massive headache and felt sick which is why I didn't eat anything during the whole flight. I slept quite a bit even though it was never longer than ten minutes or so. The flight was about nine and a half hours from London. At the airport, where I was asked quite a few personal questions, I had to learn that the Canadian custom procedures are even stricter than in the States. At around eleven in the evening I was glad when I finally arrived at the hotel in Richmond and I could sleep. I woke up again at five but felt completely rested and got up.
I spent the whole day in Vancouver and did some sightseeing in the city and the mountains. I took a lot of pictures. I uploaded a few of them to my Flickr account.
Tonight will be the first show on the tour. I'm very, very excited :=).

5 + comment + memory + edit

Sunday evening [Sunday

January 25th, 2009 @ 6:30pm]
It's been a very busy week over here in Germany. On Monday I had my oral pronunciation exam and tomorrow I'll write my very final transcription/phonetics test. The exam phase is always utterly stressful. But fortunately it will all be over in a week.

I finally received my Portland ticket which was the last ticket I was still waiting for. I put all my tickets and comfirmations into an envelope. I get all excited just looking at it.
The other day I booked my flight to Vancouver on February 18 and a few other flights to various places in the States.
I'm flying British Airways which was the cheapest I could find. I have to change in London and from there I will go to Vancouver non-stop. It's going to be a very long flight and so I decided to fly business class where they have those cozy beds.
I will travel all alone so I better make sure I'll bring lots of music and movies.

The other day I watched the new X-Files movie. It's supposed to be a gift for the fans which sounds reasonable. I didn't have too high expectations as the series had its finale many years ago and maybe less episodes or even seasons would've been better for the overall plot.
I enjoyed watching the film even though it's hardly surprising that it wasn't the best X-Files related stuff I've seen. Although it still had the special atmosphere it was more like a mediocre episode, nothing bad but nothing too special, either.
My favorite episodes are "Eve" and "Arcadia" which I watched again a few weeks ago. Especially "Eve" is a true masterpiece.

Debbie did another show with Roy Nathanson last week. I saw some pictures online on someone's personal blog. She looks truly heavenly in those photos - really, really beautiful. Just perfect.
The crowd also looked very relaxed, all those lovely school kids who seemed to have much fun. It must've been a very special day for them, a day they'll never forget, I'm sure. I hope Debbie enjoyed the show just as much as them.
This time they played eight songs together.
I would've given anything to be able to see that show, especially after the last performance with Roy in October which was such a magical day.
I enjoy those smaller events so very much as they are very relaxed and more personal, too. That's what makes them very special. They're the real gems among all the shows.
comment + memory + edit

January! [Friday

January 9th, 2009 @ 3:45pm]
My ticket for the Portland show should arrive any day now. It was a bit of a hassle with TicketsWest.
They tried to call once, made an attempt to deliver the ticket (which I had ordered on November 21 already) - and sent it straight back as noone was here to receive it. Back in the States they simply changed it to will call. However, will call is not an option for me for a general admission show. I don't want to risk not being in the front row if the box office opens at 7. That would be heartbreaking. It makes me feel safer to have all the tickets in my bag when I get on the plane.
So, it was a lot of emailing back and forth and now I kindly asked them to simply send it uninsured. I've never had a problem with that so far, so it should be here very soon.

I can't believe it's only about a month now. In December it seemed so far away and now it's only a few days. The tour will start in Richmond near Vancouver, a show which I have a ticket for as well (plus tickets for some more shows). I was lucky and got a front row seat for that show pretty much right away.

Yesterday, I finished my letter which I'm very proud of. I hope from the bottom of my heart that I will get a chance to give it to Debbie. Preferably in person. I have a feeling it's going to be a crazy tour but that would simply be wonderful. It would mean so much to me because it's another very meaningful letter.
I feel like I should've given her one in October already. There obviously was so much I had to tell her at that point already. But it wasn't finished yet and it would've been a bit too abrupt and possibly not as thoughtful as I wanted it to be because the show was quite spontaneous and so was my decision to hop over. But now I feel kind of safe and I'm very happy with the outcome.

Debbie performed at the Stephen Sprouse event at the Bowery Ballroom last night. Seeing those beautiful pictures instantly put a smile on my face. She looked breathtaking and irresistibly sweet (as always :=)). The people who were able to see her performance were really lucky and blessed.
comment + memory + edit

Saturday evening before Christmas [Saturday

December 20th, 2008 @ 8:32pm]
So, the year is almost over. I completed my 2008 survey already a few days ago. I was a bit worried it would be too early but there's not much I have to add now.

Like every year I've discovered a lot new music, not necessarily from 2008.
At this point I would like to recommend Jorane's album "Vers À Soi" and Joanna Newsom's "Ys", two albums that do not fit into any category which makes them very interesting.
Also, there's a German band (singer) I've never known before called "Get Well Soon" ("Rest Now, Weary Head! You Will Get Well Soon") which is very well-produced and reminds me a bit of Arcade Fire.
And of course, because it would break my heart not to mention it again this year, I highly recommend Debbie's solo album "Necessary Evil", my very favorite piece ever.

The last weeks I passed doing courses on Spanish written expression and American English phonetics.
I did a Spanish presentation on the change from American Modernism to Postmodernism, a topic I chose myself.
I'm nearly finished now with all the courses and I do think about my future a lot these days. I mentioned at some other point before that it's almost certainly going to lead me to America, the place where my heart belongs.

I now have tickets for most of the Blondie shows in Canada and the States next year.
It's going to be very exciting and I look forward to it every single hour of the day. I wonder if any more new songs from the upcoming album will be played and if my new little favorite song will make it onto the setlist. I will keep my fingers crossed for it.
The new album is going to be a very creative piece, I just feel it. I'm very curious about the sound, the lyrics and everything else about it.
There are many questions that make the waiting time especially exciting. But at the same time I still feel very melancholic and sad. I miss all the Debbie shows painfully. They're like air to breathe for me and without them I feel incomplete. But of course, it's not (only) about the shows in the first place, it's about seeing Debbie, the most wonderful and beautiful person in the world. I miss her so very much. But I have my little pieces that warm my heart and soul, things that make me survive, things that make me look on the positive side (as hard as it is sometimes).
Tonight she will play at a Christmas show. I hope she will enjoy it and have fun. More than anything I wish I could be there. But I'm still beyond the big ocean, putting up a tree, putting it down again and looking forward to February with a big, big smile on my face.

It seems I've missed the pre-Christmas period almost completely this year. I don't really mind much. I'm not nearly as much into Christmas anymore as I used to be.
But I traditionally appreciate it a lot for the purpose of thinking about the year, the people I met, focus on the good they've done, how they've made our lives better and thinking about how I can return their kindness.
Other than that it's always been the loneliest time of the year for me.

I wish everyone a very Merry Christmas, wonderful holidays filled with love and company, beautiful presents, peaceful words and good food and a happy and healthy New Year.
Positive things have happened this year that set the ground for more positive things to happen next year - in many respects.
comment + memory + edit

2008 survey - because it's a tradition [Tuesday

December 9th, 2008 @ 3:04pm]
2008 survey )
2 + comment + memory + edit

winter [Friday

November 21st, 2008 @ 8:17pm]
This year is slowly drawing to a close. I became aware of that when I first looked out of the window this morning and saw the neighborhood covered in snow. That is rare. Usually it never snows until January. Also, it seems like this year is going faster than usual. It feels like only a few days ago when I returned from Norway and as if my stay in New York ended only a few hours ago. In this case I highly appreciate this distorted sense of time, of course. I wish those days had never ended (needless to say, in my heart those precious moments will live on forever).
It's going to be a long winter and towards the end of it I'll be able to experience it not only from this side of the ocean but at a place very far away - on the west coast of Canada. I am very excited to write this - not only because it will be the most remote spot I will ever have travelled to - but, of course, most of all because of the prospect that I will see Debbie again. That makes me indescribably happy.
Many more snowflakes will have to fall until I can get on that plane - but the time will come. If almost four months ago feel like a few days then three months shouldn't be too long, either. 
After Vancouver I'll be heading down south to the States. I am not quite sure yet how many shows I will be able to see because there are hardly any days in between, but I will certainly go to Portland and San Francisco. I already have tickets for Canada and San Francisco here and one for the Portland show is ordered, as well. As for the other shows, I will have to see if it will be doable to travel to those places. The biggest challenge ever for me was travelling from Madrid to the Latitude festival within a day. But I made it and I'm positive that I will be able to maybe add one or two more shows this time. Every single show is like a wonderful gift. 

It's going to be a really long flight to Vancouver and I consider stopping somewhere on the way for a bit. Maybe in Nova Scotia. I've always wanted to go there. It looks like a gorgeous place. I will book my flights really soon, as soon as I know if I will be able to see the last show in California.
5 + comment + memory + edit

words [Sunday

November 16th, 2008 @ 9:53am]
Words have always had a great meaning in my life. They remain, just like a painting or a song. When we think of a person we do not only associate their face with them. It may vary from person to person and depend on the situation. But even if their picture is the first thing we associate with someone, their thoughts, ideas and feelings they expressed before come at least very close second. Words have a great power. They shape our character, they can change someone else's life but they can also change our own life. I'm very much aware of that power even though nowadays in this society there aren't that many people anymore who have the same sensitivity. These people are rare but they exist and I believe that I recognize them.
I've always been very sensitive to what's being said around me, to words that are written and to songs that are sung. I always look deeper than the lexical level.
But not only do I pay attention to someone else's words, I'm also overly careful with the words I choose myself.
For instance, when I write a meaningful letter (which doesn't happen a lot) I keep rereading it so often that I begin to memorize all trains of thoughts and even full sentences. I wrote such a letter a few months ago and I stick to what I said. It took me quite a while to get the words down as I had to make sure I'd get my thoughts across right. Nothing has changed since then and every time I read the words again I come to the conclusion that I would write it exactly the same way nowadays.
While speaking in person we're sometimes a bit vague and our blurry words fail to express a true meaning as we don't have a blueprint for a situation and much time to react. But written words give us all the time in the world and have the power to reach the very outskirts of our mind and give us the feeling like everything's been said about a matter. That is a great feeling (but also very rare - this journal is a very good example, I worry a lot about whether my thoughts come across right).
I'm currently working on a sequel to that letter I wrote. 
These days I walk around with this feeling that my words are such a relevant part of me and how relieved I am that I can share them. That thought alone can help a lot.
I have few material possessions that mean a lot to me (and those do have a deeper meaning to me, they're priceless). I carry most of it within me now - the hope I have for the future and the words that express my feelings. They give me hope and I carry them wherever I go (maybe this is actually the definition of home for me - the places where I feel hope). 
1 + comment + memory + edit

Good morning, America [Wednesday

November 5th, 2008 @ 11:26am]
Now there's finally hope for the States and the whole world, hope we had been waiting for for so long. The hardest part is yet to come when all the promises are going to be turned into reality. But we accomplished the first step and we succeeded in giving hope a chance in the first place, hope for a strategic anti-war plan, hope for equality, hope for affordable and accessible health insurance, hope for justice, hope for intelligence.

Hardly anybody knew who Sarah Palin was when McCain introduced her as his running mate. American politics probably reached the lowest peak when she started to share her pseudopolitical views with the world. 
I was seriously concerned about America, a country I was not born in but nevertheless feels like home to me, a country that was built with hard work and lots of love, great ideas and visions when the first settlers came (I'm not referring to the Puritan world view here).
It is shocking when one person alone manages to turn the nostalgic light that once shone upon the country into a blaze of stupidity and superficiality.
Obama, an enthusiastic and dedicated young man with multi-cultural background and lots of visions was facing a man who was so desperate to win the elections that he decided to count on people's superficialty while choosing his running mate, but not desperate enough to reconsider his outdated and partly misanthropic doctrines.
Seeing that Obama won the election gives me hope that my faith in mankind is justified.

There's a lot of hope being projected onto Obama now and he has to carry a heavy weight of responsibility being faced with the pile of shards that his Republican predecessor left. It's going to be a lot of hard work but I believe that he has the majority of the nation and the world population on his side.
Last night the world seems to have moved a bit closer together. 
comment + memory + edit

navigation
[ viewing | most recent entries ]
[ go | earlier ]